Nick and I decided not to have sex before marriage. There are couple of reason for it. First, sex should take place only between a wife and a husband. How do I know? Because God says so and I believe it. If you need directions in any area of life simply ask God to show you the way. You will not find better solution and He will not postpone with the right answer. God’s will is the ultimate for any human being. He knows better what for you because He created it all: your body, your soul, your mind, your partner, your life and the way things work including sex. He wants you to enjoy it in marriage as the most intimate way of communication with your spouse. The truth is that you are free by staying strong and making the right choice not to have sex and you are enslaved by it if it is done in the wrong time. There is a sequence of time in nature. You are not going to school before learning to walk, you do not buy a bed before getting a room to put it in, you do not etc. Second, our relationship is built on respect, mutual interest, love without being biased by passion only. In other words, I know that Nick loves me not just because of my slim waist and blue eyes and he knows I will stay true to him because I am not slutty and my main interest is not sex. There are many filters and adds on such as money, body, social status, nice house, etc to achieve using sex as a tool. So, tell me, where is guarantee she is doing it because she loves you? And if you love her in return what is the reason you can not marry her? How do you know she is marrying to you for the right reason? Because you have time to see who she is during your dating staying free from any bias including sex. Sex creates the bonds, which are not easy to break. Why do you need to do extra work if you by mistake or consciously connected to the wrong person? What can you offer to the right person when she or he comes along your way in its time? Third, we learned how to solve the conflicts without jumping into bed but to figuring it out verbally using patience, sacrifice, determination etc. Is it more difficult to go this way? Yes, but more effective. You do not cure headache by drinking, although it seems to work at first, do you? Drinking would be a sign of weakness and creation of illusion. People are often trapped by lies which tells them to get what they want at the moment they want. It requires a lot of wisdom to do what is right, to give it a time, to stay calm and humble. Fourth, we absolutely on a higher level than an animal instinct. So there is no aggression, selfishness, dominance, abuse, manipulation, ruling over each other etc in our hearts. Fifth, if our marriage life turns the way sex is not available tomorrow we know we can make it and stay happy loving not less. I can continue the list of reasons. Was the decision easy to make? No. Neither was it to stay true to it. But it is totally worth it.
What I am trying to say, is that sex or no sex before marriage and how soon it happens is a private matter. But keep focused and ask yourself: what i really want from this relationship? I am positive you already have the right answer what to do and what not to.
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